Camper gone bad...

Saturday was a really fun day. I got to spend it with my two favorite boys, running around town. We went out for some Thai food that night, it wasn't as good as Haleiwa Eats, but it was pretty good. Trent and I laid in bed for a while talking and somehow he got the CRAZY idea that he wanted to pull out the air mattress and sleep in the back yard!!!

Okay, to some of you this might not seem crazy! It's nice and cool but not cold here at night. We have a fenced in back yard with grass. Sounds nice right? I basically freaked out!!

It's funny how sometimes in life you don't realize your fears until you see them face to face. I started rattling off excuses as to why we couldn't sleep in the back yard. It's too cold (it wasn't), I might not hear Tru (we have a monitor), the cars will keep us awake, the neighbors have dogs, etc, etc.

The truth of it is that I am terrified to sleep or be basically anywhere that I'm not behind a locked door. We had a scary night a few years ago where we were robbed in our house. I thought that I was over it, it was in the past, I was fine.... guess not. Because the only thing that I could think of was that someone was going to jump the fence and get us in our sleep. It didn't help that a few months ago in the middle of the night (4 AM I think) there were two guys in our backyard and the cops were called, but they left before they got here.

I laid there for about an hour pretending that I was okay with this.... sure I can sleep in the backyard, until I decided that I wasn't okay with this, and then I decided that I was going to stay awake all night to make sure that nothing happened to us. We aren't exactly in the middle of the woods or something, we do live in Las Vegas for crying out loud. Trent realized that I needed my sleep and we made our way back to our comfortable bed.

This whole scenario here makes me really sad. I LOVE CAMPING!!! I love doing fun spontaneous things!! I am such an outdoor girl, I didn't realize that the idea of sleeping in the backyard would get me so worked up! I hate to think that I let some idiot take something away from me that was such a big part of who I am (or was???). The key there is that I let him...

So anyway, I guess that we all have our demons right? For some of us it's flying, or geckos, or spiders, or whatever. I'll need to work on this, because I can't live my life never sleeping outside again. Never camping again.